A Melbourne chick’s guide to the ultimate winter wardrobe
As a Melbourne-aficionado, born and bred in Melbs (well Melton to be honest, but apparently that now constitutes as part of Greater Melbourne, so I’m taking it), you could say I know a thing or two about our city’s style. That’s why I’ve put together a list of essential items every chick needs in her winter wardrobe.
Black tights that will never reach the crotch
I don’t quite understand how a skin-tight pair of sheer fabric has a way of sticking to the lower half of the legs but refuses to sit comfortably on the hips – am I buying the wrong size here? Why do tights always sag like a pair of low cut jeans on a naughties school boy? Regardless, you’re not a true-blue-Melburnian-working-woman if you don’t own a pair. Get yourself to Tar-zhe now ladies and buy two packets (cause we all know a ladder will appear in the first pair you try on).
A thick, fluffy scarf you stole from nan’s flat
That fluffy scarf you stole from nan’s while she was pottering around the kitchen brewing tea actually doubles as a blanket – it’s that big! And perfect for those wintery months in Melbs. You know what I’m talking about, those coloured tartan scarfs with specks of mattered wool. But be warned, those specks will get caught in zippers or stick to your clothes, making it look like you own a cat that won’t stop shedding or worse, you have dandruff.
Woollen socks that you see English people wear in romantic comedies
Enough said. Woollen socks that are thick enough to make your feet sweat in bed. In other words, they are the complete opposite to those dainty white frilly ankle socks that were on-trend when you were five.
Boots, big ones
Military style, Docs are out, defence force is in. The bigger the boot the better, solid heel above 2cm, black of course, and steel cap is recommended to avoid strangers stomping on toes in a packed tram. These boots are all about grunge appeal, and now that Docs have become mainstream, I advise that you buy a pair of secondhand boots from a Fitzroy Salvos – wrinkled with flaking leather and two sizes too big. Now that’s authentic.
Trench coat, the winter wardrobe’s magnum opus
Black oversized trench coat – perfect for layering with a classy Elizabeth Holmes-style turtleneck underneath and/or aforementioned nan’s scarf on top. But! Make sure the trench coat has a fabric belt to cinch the waist. After all, we want people to determine from behind that you are a woman, not Severus Snape.
Skirts are the new black
Opt for a classic long black skirt, knit or satin – up to you, both are classy. And while your calves will be exposed to the cold winter wind, your upper half will be a sweaty incubator. It all evens out in the end.
The statement headpiece
The beanie. My goodness, who knew that a classic beanie could be the crowning jewel to an outfit? Boy oh boy, the beanie has come a long way, from the heads of American coal miners and fishermen to 21st Century hipsters. You can find a beanie in almost any colour and style, but I advise against the tassels and pom poms, just go back to basics with… you guessed it! Black. No logos.
